WALK THE TALK !!
On a warm and sultry afternoon, we bumped into ALOYSIOUS CHOCKALINGAM, a student of College Of Engineering, Adoor; who just wrote his final paper of the 8 th semester. Aloysious, who is lovingly called ALLOY for his multi-faceted nature and exuberant attitude, was adjudged the BEST OUTGOING STUDENT. Alloy is the factory product of Mr. Chinnaswamy Kovaichelvan and Mrs. Celine Donna George. Mr. Chinnaswamy Kovaichelvan, a native of Tanjore, Tamilnadu, is the manager of Indian Coffee House, Bilaspur and Mrs. Celine Donna George, a native of Pala, Kerala, is a homemaker. We got to interact with this jovial, trend setting student turned engineer.Bullshit Guru aka BG is the author himself.....BG: So…Alloy chetta, how do you feel today?
ALLOY: Hey dude, take a chill pill. I dislike the way you address me. Please don’t call me chetta or achayan…
BG: How do you feel being adjudged the best outgoing student of 2006 batch of CEA?
ALLOY: Well…to make things clear, I have never entered the class in the 8 th semester, so invariably I was the Best Out- Standing...uh, I mean, I was forever out of my class. So I have never caused any problems for any of the faculty members. But the title is cool and I do feel on top of the world!
BG: You did your schooling from Bilaspur, so what prompted you to join CEA?
ALLOY: I was never keen in engineering, but as you know, these days’ parents succumb to the pressure built up by the society. So engineering was a natural option. As of coming here, during the counseling I got the seat, that’s why I opted.
BG: Now that you have completed your engineering…
ALLOY: Hey…sorry for cutting you short, I have 22 supplementary papers to clear. So you could technically call me an engineer, once I clear them all.
BG: What were your experiences like when you came in the first year?
ALLOY: I had great hopes and aspirations, when I came here for the first time. My first day at college was excellent. We were welcomed by open arms by our seniors…little did I know that, they had bigger and frightening shocks in store for all of us.
BG: Weren’t you targeted for ragging?
ALLOY: Man! Those were dreadful times! The very second day I was handed over old texts of first year and a creaky mini-drafter, all accompanied by a price tag which took the wind out of me. Being an outside Kerala guy made me the chosen one for almost all their whims and fancies. The fresher’s day brings back lot of memories; of the cute senior I was made to propose and also shoot my HoD, which was terrifying since I was aligned to the thought that one must respect their teachers!
BG: That takes us to you taking you sweet revenge on your juniors. So how did you carry out the ragging ritual on them?
ALLOY: That was payback time for me. I sold all the material I forced into first year and tried to retrieve the money I lost…that was when ragging was acknowledged as a criminal offence and to my bad luck…that bull of the unlucky junior complained to the principal and I was suspended for 5 days. I got a dressing down by my parents and can you believe I was the only one form my batch to be suspended for ragging. That made me a hero among all my batch mates...then on, however, I was suspected for everything that went wrong.
BG: How were your relations with the senior lot?
ALLOY: We did have our cold war at first but a pack of cold beers together solved most of the problems and I managed to build up some associations with them.
BG: What are the major transformations that occurred, once you entered second year?
ALLOY: When I first came to college, I was this well dressed boy with a mind concentrated on studies. Soon the inserted shirt came out permanently, shoes were replaced by slippers and the mind to study was killed and buried. From the second year, began my famous affair; the one with our college gym. I attribute the transformation from an average built me into the present well chiseled one to this rigorous time at the gym. That helps you grab the limelight in girl talks and you inevitably end up having scores of admirers. Gradually, the island beard came up and I also spiked my hair.
BG: So you were perpetually the stud and Mr. Popular?
ALLOY: See, to be a star, you need 3 major qualities:- you should fag meaning smoke and in local jargon Dum Addi; you should Booze meaning Drink and last but not the least have in procession a cute and beautiful girlfriend.
BG: What would you recollect as the most embarrassing moment you would ever have gone through?
ALLOY: We had a paper presentation in the college, and my presentation CD’s got replaced with explicit ones. I was the talk of the town. In fact it took me 4 weeks to get over the shame. And humiliation, I suffered.
BG: Quite interesting...was it any of your friends pranks?
ALLOY: I am still speculating, if it were accidental or deliberately planted, to dishonour me in front of the college.
BG: Any other similar awkward situations you encountered?
ALLOY: Yes, this was when I was very much in love with my girl. We came to college once on a Saturday, when the college had no classes. We spent some time together. And before we parted, I planted a kiss on her and that was when one of the college peon saw us in an uncompromising situation. She got worked up unnecessarily and I needed some extra vigour to soothe her.
BG: Did that put you in deep waters?
ALLOY: Who was bothered then? Anyways, we are responsible and mature enough to be accountable for ourselves.
BG: And how’s your girl now?
ALLOY: Oh fine! She is getting engaged next month and hey don’t look so bug eyed; the groom-to-be is this eternal most eligible bachelor; IT Professional guy, (grins), and not me! So I had to say goodbye to her and the affair on the last day of college.
BG: Oh! That is sad.
ALLOY: (Shrugs), I guess so, we had some good moments together.
BG: Alright, Alloy, do tell me your war with exams.
ALLOY: Dude, you put it right, exams have always been a war! Of running around to find out what the topics were, to which books had it all, to cramming it all up in the eleventh hour, exams, for me, have been typical rush hour. And how can I ever forget the hard work of preparing the ever useful chits and the ultimate agony of not finding the right one from the bunch of others?!
BG: And you’ve never been caught?
ALLOY: Oh yeah! Once. That was when I was writing from my friend’s front sheet. I was caught with the booty red-handed and my evasive reasons were spoiled by my friend chickening out and blabbering the truth.
BG: What happened then?
ALLOY: I was let off in the end, anyway, after repeatedly apologizing and constant begging, and was lucky enough not to get myself de- barred. So these days I tend to be a bit more careful with the stunt!
BG: How were your relations with your professors?
ALLOY: (Laughs) Never very good! I always managed to irritate them all by sleeping in class if I got in at the first place or getting caught writing last minute assignments. Anyways I was the perennial back bench fellow who did anything but study in class. Semester endings were always spent running behind them with fabricated duty leave letters and cursing them for my pathetic internal marks.
BG: Great! Now why don’t you tell us about hostel life?
ALLOY: Life away from home was first time for me, so the first few days were a struggle. Then began all the fun of being a hosteller. The first year, we were staying with a family, so it was a bit difficult to jump the wall to get to bed after a secret boozing night out! But after we moved out, it was freedom of a different kind. Late night food at the wayside thattu kada, the fight for the last pint of rum at the bar, girl talks…ultimate!
BG: What were your favourite times at college?
ALLOY: Definitely Arts, sports, inter-collegiate fests; in short all those days when there was no class, no rigours of completing rough records in labs, only fun and masti !
BG: Well, Alloy, what do you plan to do with your life in the future?
ALLOY: First thing, I’d like to prepare a convincing answer to that question, coz I have a feeling lot of people are gonna ask me the same! To tell you the truth, I haven’t thought of anything yet, but I guess now that this zero botheration college life has ended, I’ll have to get responsible for myself…hey, I’ll come up with something soon, though.
(We had walked through the college corridors, the stairs, down the road, and now stood at the place where endless smokes were shared, where we guys stood and commented the passing girls. As I watch Alloy, I see in him the life of every typical CEA guy, mirroring an engineering life that is terrific at times and strenuous at others. He has some of my feelings just like you can see some of you in him and some of him in you.)
